Tis been a while

So I realised that I have not been posting on here much lately... I plan to change that.

I have been reading Ruby Quest (http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Ruby for all of those who don't know) lately also, this is awesome and I estimate that I may be finished it sometime soon with the rate or reading I am currently doing =D ... this however has pushed me into wanting to do two things: 1) cut down my weight a bit and 2) build up my manly physique, this however will take time so may be a while.

I have also been considering putting a little bit of different colour into my fur self just so its not complete black but I do not know what colour or where, any suggestions? or should I keep as all black maybe? or perhaps a complete change of colour... tell me what you think.

Lastly... my phone has still not come.. grrrrrr. I have however emailed to ask about what the fuck is going on.

Right well that's all really

Signing out

Spike Revy Lawliet Rin Lelouch Neko Santarius IV

I fuck shit up

Sometimes i wonder...

... as to exactly why my mind must make me worry so much.

I worry about, myself, what I've done, what I'm doing, what I may do, the world, what could happen, what could be real or could be fake, what has already happened and may happen again, what I do, what I should do, what I shouldn't do, what I think I should do but really shouldn't do, what I could do but wont, what I cant do but want to, the people around me, the people I care about, what may happen to the people I care about, the possibility of offending the people I care about, things people want me to say but I don't, things people want me to do but I don't, not thinking enough, thinking too much, not doing enough, doing too much, spending too much, not spending enough, being too free, not being free enough to be my own self, relying on others too much, not helping others enough, not being there for others when they need me, thinking of myself too much, worrying too much, not having a job, not having an income, not making sense, talking too little, talking too much, putting people in awkward situations, putting myself in awkward situations, not being a good friend, going on and on and on about things which may or may not matter, conspiracies, people saying one thing and meaning another, people saying they like me when really they don't, meeting new people who I may offend, loosing old friends who I have already offended, jumping into things without thinking first, thinking too much about something and missing out on the opportunity, not having enough time in this world to do all I want to, trying to be impressive, trying to not look to self-centred, trying to be funny...


... wanting to be with you when I know there are so many reasons I shouldn't think that.

anyway, I just wanted to put that out there.

Hmmmm

Ever get the feeling that you have single handedly screwed something up big time and that sometime soon there will be almighty concequences heading your way yet your not exactly sure what it was you did or who to?

also, i have no idea exactly what i'm doing with my life, i have so many ideas but not enough guts to actually implement any of them...


... i feel like such a looser, i just want to win for a change. i know so many people who are total win.

admitadly, i dont like me... i never have so i pretend, i go round all the time acting self centrered and if i dont like who i am i guess i cant really expect anyone else to either.

Update

I'm SEXY... yeah... you know its true!!!

I'm also very self centered and FUCKING proud of it

so, i am now just a hat away from being "slick daddy: Awesome pimp"

I have the loose jeans, i have the dull yellow shirt, i have the red tie and the army boots, i have the long black jacket and the aviator glasses... now i just need to wait for my pimp hat to be delivered... yeah

ten to one ... items not in order

Ten turn ons

1. American, Australian, Irish or Scottish Accents
2. Someone who can put up with my insane ammounts of wierd
3. Someone who is a great musician/singer
4. someone who knows when a joke is funny and it has gone too far
5. knows their own mind but isnt too overpowering
6. Loyal
7. Willing to give new things a try
8. Wont argue about petty little differences
9. Someone who will suprise me from time to time
10. As in the famous words or Rayne Summers: "I likes dem titties"

Nine turn offs

1. Looks down on me as inferior
2. Getting mad at me constantly and trying to be manipulative
3. Someone who is Plain and boring
4. Someone who is Unadaptive
5. Someone who puts me down for being me
6. Somone who puts me down for liking the things i like
7. Does drugs/smokes/drinks alot
8. Complaining for no reason
9. Has no sence of humour

Eight songs you've been listening to on repeat

1. Ben Folds - Army
2. Ben Folds - Always someone cooler
3. Ben Folds - Learn to live with what you are
4. Ben Folds - All u can eat
5. Ben Folds - Free coffee town
6. Tim Minchin - Mitsubishi Colt
7. Tim Minchin - Rock n Roll Nerd
8. Tim Minchin - Ten Foot Cock and a few thousand Virgins

Seven bad habits

1. Acting like I'm 7, thinking like I'm 4
2. My tendency to act then speak
3. sometimes abandoning something out of boredom
4. not thinking of things to put so adding in random fillers
5. Wild mood swings
6. Feeling melancholy for no apparent reason
7. Procrastinating

Six obsessions

1. getting attention
2. cheese
3. Japan and all to do with it
4. females i know i shouldnt be interested in but still am
5. Web comics
6. Ben Folds

Five things you did today

1. Job interview
2. Lookd at red ties and pimp hats
3. listened to music
4. Talked on messenger
5. Chillaxed

Four things you're thinking of

1. Im Pimp yall
2. My melancholious mood
3. L
4. getting a red tie and aviator glasses

Three childhood heroes

1. Mr Motivator
2. Alvin and the chipmunks
3. Chip n Dale: rescue rangers

Two places you see yourself in

1. CA for the ben folds gig
2. My own home/flat (not sure where yet)

One thing you do before you die
1. figgure out what type of person i am and where i belong

yo

Ever had a point when youve tried so hard to convince others that you're cool that you actually start to believe it yourself... then you rralise your not...

... no? well i guess thats probably cos most of you who read this are actually cool to begin with

well anyway, i just had that thought, now im partially down...









... i want to belong

Evil - (insert catch phrase here)

so... first of all i would like to point out that i am chilaxin, drinkin a beer and watching red dward... how much more manly could i be?

right, so ive started a cult simply called "EVIL" ... its mostly so if you get pestered by bible people you can hand your own pamphlet and scare em off =D ... however it is not finnished yet so will not be unveiled untill i am saticfied with it completely. i need advice though. i need a catchphrase. i was thinking:

EVIL - cos you deserve a bit of fun
EVIL - just do it
EVIL - makin this shit fun
EVIL - makin this shit fun yo
EVIL - Pimpin goodness
EVIL - anything you want for your soul
EVIL - cos dark is awesome
EVIL - now available in lil evil too

so, what are your thoughts on the matter?

Spike Revy Lawliet Rin Lelouch Neko Santarius IV

OMFG

i now have £117.19 in my bank... WOOT ... this is good saying as this morning a had 74p in it. the payment finally came through, more then i expected though... oh well, who am i to complain.

whos da pimp now

Spike Revy Lawliey Rin Lelouch Neko Santarius IV

“So you're gonna live in Paradise...

...With a ten-foot cock and a few hundred virgins,
So you're gonna sacrifice your life
For a ride on a UFO”

Not much point to putting that apart from it is a great song.

Anyway, so I didn't have my power cable for the laptop all yesterday, I eventually found it where all things end up... down the side of the sofa, damn.

So, I got thinking and was doing nothing but until about 2am, this happens on a regular occurrence, however, whereas most of the time not much comes from it, a few times I will suddenly gain access to the answer of something I may have been thinking of for a while. Anyway a few people lately have been asking as to what sexual preferences I am.

I have thought about it long and hard (hehe, that wasn't supposed to be a sexual reference BTW) and I have come to the conclusion that I am pretty much straight with being gay only to the point of flirting with guys, I don't think I could go beyond that honestly so I'm not going to try.

Sorry guys, this means you don't get my awesome self

Meanwhile, your in luck ladies, you've got me all to yourself

(not that I'm trying to make myself sound arrogant at all)

Anyway, that's about all apart from I may have a interview soon, this makes me happy, especially as the job would give me free cinema tickets and advanced viewings of films. =D

Pimpin out y'all

Spike Revy Lawliet Rin Lelouch Neko Santarius IV

Ah... Right

so, im feeling down at the moment.

i shall not say why (this has nothing to do with death note though that may have contributed)

at least i have my friends online to make me feel better =) thanks draken and laura, your doin great

plus there is the money i should be gettin on tuesday (this will not much help my mood but will help other things) and the fur meen on sunday so all will be well soon

whenever i get one of these downs for the reason i am in one now it usually only lasts about a day or two

anyway, there isnt really much point to this post really.... just wanted to post something

Spike Revy Lawliet Rin Lelouch Neko Santarius IV